Fellow parents, now is the time to focus.
About this time of year, St. Joseph heard from an angel and then arranged to take his pregnant wife to Bethlehem. With a laser-like focus, inspired by the message of an angel, he left all that he knew in Nazareth and thumbed his nose at his surrounding cultural forces. And Mary graciously let herself be led—on a donkey no less!
Their shared mission would lead to the poverty of a stable, persecution, and even exile in Egypt. And to the advent of the Son of God.
The question is: Do we spiritually lead our families forward to Bethlehem—and beyond—with St. Joseph’s resolve and Mary’s trust? Do we fix our eyes on the far horizon and take the next step of faith today? Do we tenderly yet firmly set the tone for Advent in our homes?
We look around. Recession. Grocery bills that induce tachycardia. The state of our nation and world. The spiritual drift of families everywhere. The pace of work. The darkening days. The devil prowling around every marriage and family, seeking any inroad to destroy them.
On top of all of this, how can we be expected to summon the energy to make an existential step of faith and lead our families towards the elusive, red-hot, spiritual core of the season? When we can barely get our own act together, how can we be expected to set the spiritual bar higher for our entire family?
It’s no wonder that countless parents—us included in too many years past—check out. No offense, Holy Family, but to your far-flung mission, we say, “We just can’t.” Instead, we slip into weeks of near-robotic decorating, shopping, eating, and wrapping. It’s no wonder that many of us, come late December, are irritable, worn-out husks who succumb to a listless, post-Christmas funk.
On November 20, Arlington Bishop Michael Burbidge invited us into the second preparatory year for the diocesan 50th anniversary—with a year-long focus on the Blessed Mother, “the model disciple, who shows us how to receive the Word and bear the Word to the world.” The focus can be summarized in her words, “My soul rejoices in the Lord.”
For any parent without a plan, here’s an idea: take up this focus on the Blessed Mother now, this Advent, and carry it forward. Whether you aim to protect, guide, and serve her in your wife, or attempt to model her meekness and trust toward your husband, the spirit of Advent in your family will flourish. Here are three steps toward a better season:
First, commit to taking up your spiritual fatherhood or motherhood. Bishop Burbidge, our spiritual father, has asked us to focus on the Blessed Mother. Following his lead in a particular way this Advent, we as spiritual fathers and mothers in our own homes can commit and demonstrate that we are part of something larger than ourselves.
Second, reflect on how St. Joseph devoted himself to Mary and how Mary responded with trust. Joseph was present to Mary’s needs in ways that directly challenge any temptation we may have to check out. For her part, Mary was grateful, trusting, and undemanding. None of this is easy, so read the infancy account in Matthew’s first chapter, and ask the Lord to renew your spiritual presence and stance in the home.
Third, make Mary’s Magnificat your own in a new way this Advent. Consider praying the Magnificat—which is part of the Liturgy of the Hours, specifically Evening Prayer—daily on your own, and nightly with your family, perhaps as you light the Advent candles. Maybe a chart on your fridge—your family’s “Magnificat Challenge”—will help you to stay focused.
Just imagine. An angel tells you in a dream to leave the familiarity of Nazareth behind, and lead your family on a mission into the unknown to welcome the Christ Child and become the Holy Family. What is your response? On December 30th, as other parents slip into listlessness after a consumerism-focused Advent, may we instead celebrate the Feast of the Holy Family with great joy!
> In “Invite the Saints into Your Home,” a previous post, we share three practical ways to build awareness of the saints in your home.
> Going back to the source…here is a compilation of Scripture verses on saints, and here is a compilation of passages about our call to become saints from the Catechism which we found helpful.
> Check out any of these video reflections by Bishop Robert Barron on the topic of saints, the communion of saints, and prayer. You’ll even find “Saints and Smartphones,” a reflection offering guidance from saints and spiritual masters.
> It’s easy to get tripped up on an important distinction about saints—we “honor” them as opposed to “worship” them. If you want to brush up on this, here’s a helpful article on this point.
> Our thanks to Mark Voorheis, who shared an inspiring and practical reflection on fatherhood at our Nov. 12th Heaven in Your Home Gathering at St. John’s in Leesburg. Let’s just say the 35 parents were doing “zone defense,” with over 50 children present! 22 pizzas disappeared in a matter of minutes! One participant shared, “It’s always refreshing and encouraging to hear other parents’ perspectives, their same trials, tips, and more!” Another parent said, “It’s great to see other families in this joyful, uplifting setting!” Mark your calendar for Feb. 4th, our next Gathering. > Do some Christmas shopping with us at Trinity House Cafe + Market! Stop by this weekend to pick up your Advent candles, advent calendars, and hand-made Christmas cards by artist Betsy Farr! We carry new children’s books, our ever-changing selection of used books, original art, prints, candles, soap, faith-inspired jewelry, stationery, and of course gift cards (here’s the link for our e-gift cards) that the recipient can use for anything in the Café or Market.
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