Fatigue. Distraction. Burnout… And yes: Focus. Order. Thriving…

Perhaps nowhere is the push-and-pull between these dynamics more keenly felt in a Trinity House than in Level 3, Household Economy, our focus with you in the third week of each month (and so timely in light of today’s Solemnity of St. Joseph, patron of workers and the family).

We felt it just last week on the joyful occasion of our two college students returning home for Spring Break. Yes! Together at last! But…it was a significant boost to the logistical complexity of laundry, dinners, and cleaning up, not to mention stretching two cars among five drivers.

Everyone has their own version of the Level 3 seesaw, but we’d like to share three daily steps we’ve been testing out in our never-ending (!) attempt to figure out this level. Here goes:

Step #1 | Envision your mini-Sabbath at the end of the day.

Why do we go to all the daily trouble of our Household Economy? All the endless cycles of dishes, tidying, laundry, vacuuming, cooking? Sure, we have to; we won’t be able to fight our way out of the mess if we don’t. But there’s a much more compelling reason.

Before jumping in to the endless to-dos for each day, envision the end goal—your family, seated around the table this evening, enjoying communion, sharing their hearts, listening, laughing, and talking about the day. Before them is a good meal, a kitchen “more or less” in order, and parents that are coming to the table focused, peaceful and ready to serve.

We know this is asking a lot. Heaven knows, we constantly fall short of this ideal. But this visualization exercise might be just what you need to launch into the day ahead with a cheerful spirit, knowing exactly why it’s all worth it. We work hard to care for our communion in Household Economy so that we can enjoy it in Family Culture.

A quick word of encouragement to young families who feel like they just see chaos at the family meal: Hang in there! You are building the healthy habits—proven by many a social scientist—that will give your kids a strong foundation for life; this exhausting season will pass more quickly than you think and give way to more order and fun around the table.

Step #2 | Have a little cup of coffee with your will.

That’s right, a quick check-in with your will. By “will,” here’s what we have in mind (italics ours): “Freedom is the power, rooted in reason and will, to act or not to act, to do this or that, and so to perform deliberate actions on one’s own responsibility. By free will one shapes one’s own life” (Catechism, 1731).

All too often, we race into our day without first checking in with our will. And before we know it, its subtle and stubborn designs—to do what it feels like rather than what we want—self-sabotage what we had set out to do. You know how it goes: social media, scrolling, distractions…and lots of objectively “good” things which pop into mind and derail us.

Instead, what if we checked in with our will for two or three minutes at the beginning of the day in ways such as:

• Bring your will before the Lord with a prayer such as this: “Lord, you have given me the gift of my will, a power for good or for ill. Strengthen my will today to shape my actions to your glory, as I seek to care for the communion you have entrusted to me.”
• Imagine a little conversation with your will. Ask, “What’s holding you back? What are you motivated about today? What’s causing you fear or anxiety?” Your curiosity in this conversation will bring important things to the surface: for example, rather than powering into immediate activity, maybe you need to experience God’s unconditional love in a quiet moment of rest. And if all of this sounds a little nutty, remember that no less a spiritual giant than St. Paul wrote about the interplay between his “inmost self” and his “members” which seemed to be at war with one another.
• Meditate while looking at the Trinity icon. Consider how the will of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are united—and how God is inviting us to a similar union of reason and will on behalf of our loved ones.

Step #3 | Now do the work in peace and good cheer.  

One of our favorites, Servant of God Catherine de Hueck Doherty (1896-1985) wrote, “The duty of the moment is what you should be doing at any given time, in whatever place God has put you.” And French Jesuit Father Jean Pierre de Caussade (1675-1751) wrote, “The revelation of the present moment is an ever freshly springing source of sanctity. The present moment is the manifestation of God.”

Not a lot to say here. By this point, you’ve checked in with two of your superpowers (vision and will), and brought them before the Lord, allowing Him to harness them for the goal of leading your family heavenward. You’ve prayerfully visualized where all your Household Economy work is leading—to the deepening of communion around your table and in the further celebration of your family’s unique culture.

And now, the “duty of the moment”—this “present moment…the manifestation of God”—beckons us forward. Saint Joseph, Patron of Families and of Workers, pray for us!