Just the other day, a dear relative said, “I need your kids’ Christmas lists!” Our pulse quickened. We had just managed to find our Advent wreath in a corner of the basement, and we haven’t even started on our family Christmas card. When we might start thinking about gifts is still very much in question!

Once the panic subsided, we reminded ourselves that, instead of jumping on the Christmas treadmill, it’s time to place ourselves in the very first Advent, in the shoes of Mary and Joseph on their journey from where they lived in Nazareth to a different kind of home in Bethlehem.

We’ve been over their story so many times that we tend to skip the details, fast-forwarding right to our favorite part: Christmas morning. But what if we slowed down and realized we need to make our own journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem?

We really don’t want to stay in Nazareth—our default life with its overwrought, joyless self-justification projects, impersonal tendencies, and ideas of what it all “should” look like. No, we know we’re being invited to leave all that behind and step out on a journey to a home and family transformed by the central presence of Jesus Christ.

At the heart of our family’s prayer this season is a desire to make home a taste of heaven. As we journey from our old life to opening our home to live with God Himself, we hope to leave behind our often-self-centered schemes, and be guided instead by His other-centered way of life.

As we focus on the Gospel accounts of that first Advent, we glimpse Joseph and Mary making their way together along the road. We feel their shared anticipation, their mounting expectation of the Christ Child. And we sense just how recent their incredible meetings were: Mary’s message from the angel Gabriel… Joseph’s visit from an angel in a dream…

As we accompany them to their new life with Jesus, perhaps we overhear Mary and Joseph talking about their questions and awe over their angelic encounters. We might also become aware of their pain at the rejection they so recently received from their neighbors.

Walking through Advent with the Holy Family, their struggles and joys take on the capacity to reframe our own. Like us, they too need to stop and rest. At times, Mary seems lost in joyful prayer, at other times, in deep exhaustion. She watches Joseph lovingly, anticipating ways she can help. Meanwhile, Joseph is attentive, resolute, and protective over her and the child.

When they finally arrive in Bethlehem, heavy with fatigue, they are met with closed doors. Many are the times in life when we experience the same. But like Mary and Joseph, when we have open doors to each other, that sure softens the blow. The first pangs of labor come, and still, no room. Even so, their baseline of trust and peace remains. Somehow, they know there is still something very beautiful to come.

This is the Advent decision we all face in the coming weeks and beyond, throughout the whole year. We can stay back in Nazareth with our image, our comforts and our self-reliance, and just skip this entire trip. If we choose this—the default version of Advent—then with each passing day, Jesus, Mary and Joseph disappear farther and farther down the road.

Or—we can risk it all! We families who aspire to be holy can join the Holy Family as they set out. Daily, we can meditate on the Advent scriptures, walking the road to Bethlehem, carrying our common burdens and sharing our common joys. We can head toward Bethlehem with the mindset that, when we arrive on Christmas Day, our family will dwell together with almighty God, and He will provide for all our needs.

And so, we are gradually led to experience their joy, despite the humble surroundings, when the Christ Child is born into their little “home” in Bethlehem. If we do risk it all on God, we give our families the greatest gift: a journey that ends, not just in fleeting Christmas joy for this year, but in safe footsteps to walk in for many different kinds of journeys to come.

In the end, of course, there is no perfect Advent. Just like there are no perfect families. But we hope that when this year’s journey is complete, we’ll experience a deepened gratitude—for life, for God’s love, for our marriage and the miracle of each of our children, and for the chance to walk with you and your family as we all seek to make our homes a taste of heaven—our own “Trinity House”—to share with others!

This is an adaptation of our very first Advent letter in 2019. Happy four years of Heaven in Your Home Letters!