Several years ago, when we were in the testing phase of what would become the Trinity House Community Groups—now at 60 parishes in 15 states—we invited Dr. John Cuddeback to share a keynote with families about building a flourishing household. To say his talk resonated is an understatement. So when we saw that his new book was out, The Intentional Household: Living as if People Matter, we reached out to ask him for an interview.

We’re excited to share the interview here, and we encourage you to dig more deeply into his resources at LifeCraft as a practical way of strengthening your Trinity House’s Level 3, Household Economy.

What inspired you to write The Intentional Household?

Cuddeback: Countless people are struggling to make their homes what they want them to be. They know they want something better, but they feel powerless and discouraged when they run into major obstacles so common today. This book is for them. It is designed to form their mind with clear, memorable principles and to inspire their action with concrete applications.

What takeaways are you hoping readers put into practice in their own family life?

Cuddeback: I think the biggest concrete takeaway will be to lean into rediscovering the power of the ordinary—or of what should be ordinary: shared work in various home arts and true leisure in time-tested rich activities. Homelife will be renewed from within as the household becomes a real center of vibrant life, every day.

As you look at families today, what do you see as the three biggest obstacles to creating an intentional household?

Cuddeback: Obstacle one: the assumption that life really happens outside the home (an assumption that is embodied in countless common practices, such as on overemphasis of ‘profession’). Obstacle two: the loss of the knowledge and practice of the home-arts, which leads to the household being simply consumptive and not productive. Obstacle three: the way that technologies that compromise human presence and interaction (as well as good work and true leisure) are constantly pedaled to us and change how we live. These obstacles can be overwhelming.

What gives you hope that families can overcome these obstacles and create an intentional household?

Cuddeback: We are made for something better and our hearts are telling us this in countless ways, especially in the epidemic experience of isolation, disconnection, and uprootedness. This moves many to look for something different. And the Holy Spirit is at work inspiring us to rediscover God’s plan for homelife. Additionally, the better way is always right there before us, we just need to be intentional, courageous, and savvy in choosing and doing it, by the grace of God.

Looking back, do you see a turning point in your own life as a father and husband…a moment when the content of The Intentional Household really crystallized for you?

Cuddeback: It wasn’t so much a moment as a growing realization that my marriage and my children demanded something more. Life is always about relationships. Making an intentional household is especially about putting people first in very concrete and often demanding ways, every day. Especially in this age, the happiness of our children simply demands that we be intentional and do something radically different.

We are big fans of your scholarship on “reclaiming the household” and your call to recover a greater sense of shared work in the home. In the Trinity House model, we speak of Level 3 – Household Economy – as that arena in which we “care for our communion.” How do you see the themes of The Intentional Household relating to this idea of “communion” and God’s Trinitarian life, which we are called to reflect in our families (Catechism 2205, “The Christian family is a communion of persons…”)?

Cuddeback: I love what you are doing. Indeed, life is always about communion of persons. This is why the rich practice of household is the primordial place of human formation and shared life. God’s plan is always better than we have yet discovered. The ordinary practices of household work are precisely the divinely designed context to discover what real communion looks and feels like. It is a unique preparation for living in the ‘house of the Lord forever’ (Ps 23). The restoration of homelife is at the center of our returning to God’s plan for our salvation. It demands that we wake up and take a new perspective.

Let’s imagine you’re talking to someone who feels overwhelmed and unsure of how to begin the journey of building an intentional household. What is one small practical first step to take within the next week?

Cuddeback: Great question. Start with baby steps. Lean into shared meals precisely because they are a way of living in communion every day. Also, think in terms of the key duo of work and leisure; choose one practice of each to work on. For work maybe it’s making meals together, or working in the yard or garden; or other simple home projects done by hand. For leisure maybe it’s stargazing, or a family walk, or reading aloud on Sunday afternoon. These are not insignificant, especially when done with consistency! Enacted with intentionality and supernatural charity they will be profound forces for renewal, beginning in our homes and radiating out from there.

Where can people find your book? And your other offerings?

Cuddeback: It’s available at Ignatius.com and most anywhere you get your books. I offer free on-demand courses, the Intentional Household podcast and more at LifeCraft.